Count the Blessings

远方的朋友，及时的鼓励 ， 恰好的安慰。 我虽未发声 ，祂已听见了，与你分享那份最真的爱 : > 《单纯的爱祢》 马路上车来人往，顿时让我感到迷茫 落叶飘零的大树下是那沧桑的模样 重重的迈出那一步，带走的只有彷徨 像垂死的纤夫，直直的凝望   我总是在喧嚣过后才体会祢的心肠 祢却从未离开过，虽我看不见祢的模样 轻轻的祢向我走来，安抚我的忧伤 像一阵风，吹过我的脸庞   牵我的手啊 主，不要离开我 我虽信，但我信心真的不足 我是你的孩子啊，我的主耶稣 我想更多认识祢，单纯的爱祢 只想单纯的爱祢     “坚强外表，脆弱内心 也许未能平静，但不要否认自己 你有神的形象，是神所亲爱的宝贝。 虽有时乌云密布，但并不代表上帝“死了” 所以，喜乐并不一定要改变环境，有时是心境。”

偶尔，会想涂鸦下久违的Blog，一年一度的偶尔，就在今天！ 偶尔，给空间自己伤感下，才不会亏待自己。就像倾听你爱人的哭诉般，也倾听下自己的伤感。 偶尔，告诉自己，伤感没有错，伤感后继续伤感才是笨。伤感中，伪装刚强更可悲。 偶尔，上帝会提醒我，“我孩，哭吧，放胆哭吧。不要怕，我就在这。你的泪，我都握在手心。” 当仅有的守护天使，辞职不干时，你学会了，要好好爱自己。 领悟到，当勇敢的告诉自己，“这不是我的。” 谢谢他人带着关爱的提醒，“有些东西不work，就是不work。” 不要为失去而自责，要为仍拥有自己而感恩。 最可悲的，不是失去曾爱过的人，而是失去值得被人爱的自己。 上帝最痛的，莫过于失去你。 找回自己，找回最初最单纯的你，上帝一直在你身边，紧紧地等待。 上帝要你过得快乐，你快乐吗? 我，很快乐 ><

We are the man of limitation, define by quantifiable space and time, so is our ability and capacity. Mum admitted into hospital after a week long of fever. A long process of investigation hence began, involving multidisciplinary team of specialist, there were HO, MO, rheumatologist, orthopedic surgeon, ID specialist, and etc. Certainly with multiple means of investigation too, X-ray, daily blood test monitoring, ultrasound and etc. I am truly grateful for the medical team, especially the HO, though they were exhausted with the workload and numerous on-call, yet they are credible and thoughtful in the investigation process, make me feel so warm and so touched. 15 days of hospitalisation, 15 days of persistent effort from the doctors, nurses, and family, yet the cause and the source of illness were failed to be identified. She discharged after normal body temperature resume, and the discharge note diagnosis is nasocomial infection... I was not satisfied with the diagnosis, the...

Even when you were at the junction of life transition period. I had went through it once, during my first graduation. It wasn't just about graduating and venturing into working life, it's about fulfilling one's life's purpose, to go one step further in living out purpose driven life. The first was really hard for me, was the hardest I had ever experienced that time, it took me indeed longer than i expected. Not just contemplating on future prospect, it was also other things, all came at once; financial, mum's health,  own's health, relationship. And guess what, you had no one else but yourself, this is a battle you gotta stand up and fight, though you have close friends and family, they can never be you and fight the fight for you. Truly all by God's grace. I was alone, but the only one whom I can bring along throughout the battle is Christ the Lord, in fact HE was ahead of me fighting the battle. HE will never relent on me, never. I was so amazed on h...

Truly need a break, but it isn't the physical state where i need to stop my errants. My head is dizzy, eye is sore, nose is block, limbs are weak, of course not completely literally, just a metaphor of my tiredness. The world is sadden by sad news so often, at particular moment, when you scrutinize the other side of the world, you wish that the whole world could just stop awhile that you can have sufficient space to mourn or feel sympathy for them. Yet, the hassle pace keep pushing me, i need to wisely utilise the capacity available to feel sympathy. How much i wish i could just take a pause and have more time for them. As much as i wish, life still has to go on, i still need to chase for assignment datelines, think about job seeking, and etc. Yet, whatever capacity i can squeeze out, i try to fill it with something other than myself. The world today is consuming our empathy and sympathy unnecessary, that we are running out of that when we really need it. The nar...

今天与朋友聊了一个我不再熟悉的话题，发现爱情在许多人眼中不再是我想象那样了。 但当世界越来越现实、人被逼得越来越非踏实不可时， 我仍相信有人是真心愿意付出的，不是为了得到，而是为了让对方幸福。 至少我会锻炼自己向着这方向前进。 毕竟，爱是一辈子的东西，无法顺其自然，务必要不断努力耕耘。 当彼此在上帝的爱里得满足时，就能无私舍己的爱一辈子。 我仍相信真心就在转角处 :>

Truly a challenging month. It makes me feel breathless by just looking at the schedule. Already confused with numerous existing deadlines, the newly added make me stunned. Perhaps I was astonished, such a tough trial for me which seemingly beyond possibility, ability and capacity of mine, yet all by His grace, truly my honour. Well, this is just the beginning, more to come when we grow stronger and each aim to make us grow even stronger. The moment of great challenge is indeed the time of refreshing, we can't press on without being refresh by the Lord. For God will always gives us the strength and joy to sing the song of Spring in the time of Winter.

" Faith spells trust, faith persistence, courage, and faith spells REST too." Have so much on my plates, different different plates, too much tht I still have no clue at all how am I going to deal with them, while some are clashed timing badly, some are beyond my ability, some are too large for my capacity. We often seems to be anxious, worry, frustrated, nervous, helpless, weary and etc under such circumstances, and I was tempted likewise. I was tempted to just switch on emotion-autopilot button and just let what seems normal to dwell. But no way! Faith spells rest! Be still, let not the turbulence to carry you away from the peace given to you by grace. Rest in the Lord, breath in the fragrance of peace and joy every second! Therefore, it's really time for  me to rest literally ><

"If GOD answers all our prayers in the past, we would shed more tears than when GOD didn't answer." He hears all our prayers , for that I am sure, but I have no right at all to ask him respond to all my petition as I wish. Truly life would be a disaster if all my prayers were answered. Some prayers when I was young were awful, a case in point "oh dear god, I wish I was the only child at home; or I wish I could pass the exam without studying; I wish SPM will be canceled; I wish....I wish....". Grown ups still says awful prayer at times. We pray for what we think best for us , at times our petition is base on the desire of our flesh and not the benefits of the Kingdom.  God knows what best for us and His Kingdom . I know Him deeper through the aswered and also the unanswered prayers, both build my faith and strengthen my love. Dear Lord, thank you for hearing all my prayers, though the unanswered one often seems to make me  feel miserable...